Revisit Your Non-Negotiables

It’s cold, the days are shorter, the daylight is limited; times are changing.

These past few weeks have been one long stretch of exhaustion. Through a combination of many things; the time change, the blistering cold, family schedule adjustments, work responsibilities.

With transition comes change.

Change is hard, even the smallest minute changes. Just this week my wife and I moved our coffee maker to the opposite side of the kitchen thinking it would be more efficient, it only lasted two days.

Pushing Through the Dip

I recently had a conversation with a friend of mine in which he was venting his frustrations about work. Nothing seemed to be motivating him, he’s uninspired, he’s lost the creativity flow he once had.

I responded with, “It sounds like you’re in the dip.”

The dip, explained by Seth Godin in his book The Dip, is the idea that every new project or job starts out with endless amounts of drive, motivation and excitement. But then, deeper in to the commitment, it gets harder and less fun, until it finally hits a low point where it’s really hard, and not much fun at all.

You then find yourself asking if the commitment and journey you set out on is even worth the hassle. Maybe you’re in a dip; a temporary setback that will get better if you keep pushing.

The Atmosphere of Growth

Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that, but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing. — William Butler

Reflecting on the past two years of this journey, it’s been up and down. Currently, I am in the trough a bit. I’m not as happy as I was earlier this year and I know that’s because my growth has slowed.

Happiness doesn’t come from goal attainment, but rather, growth; the process in which we strive towards goals. Tweet this

We try to come up with this definition of what happiness is or is not. We spend so much of our time trying to find it or obtain it when in fact it cannot be pursued. Happiness ensues.

But yet, we travel the journey in pursuit of it.

Lack of Integrity

Inwardly they begin to change but to keep the peace play an outward role. This, by nature, is a lack of integrity (the inner self integrated with the outer self) and will be the end of you. Healthy people are integrated and unhealthy people are not. Donald Miller, Storyline Blog

Reading this brought about the reality in where I am with this journey.

It’s funny, when you listen closely, you find at times there’s a recurring theme that speaks to you from various sources in a short period of time.

Why Do You Do What You Do?

Two years ago my life was an emotional roller coaster.

I was challenging myself to always do more, to wear more hats, to climb the corporate ladder faster, to be involved in more; thinking I could handle the demands. All of these areas were tugging at me from different sides.

I was focusing on, and seeking, the wrong things. I was living in the past and looking to transform the future all while glossing over the moment that matter most, the present.

There was no purpose for my daily motions, nor quest. I was living in the confides of what society had built trying not to bump up against the walls of the path laid out for me.

Calming Your Head Chatter

Does head chatter control your day? Does it gloss you over the present moment going through the motions of your daily to-do’s, tasks and projects? Does your head chatter strip you away from an intimate conversation blocking you of any kind of deeper connection?

It does for me. In fact, sometimes it can be so bad, so far off course, that the head chatter creates stress and anxiety within me.

In reality, all of this (head chatter) stems from an imaginative place. The head chatter is what we create, or imagine, around the source, to be true, that causes the pain.

We take ourselves down unnecessary rabbit hole after rabbit hole.

Lean Into It

Do you ever catch yourself thinking about the interests you abandoned or the ones you want to pursue, the projects you wish you could work on, the things in your community you wish would change or the art you’ve been putting on the back burner because life is just too busy?

Family, job, household, school, community; those hats you wear that eat at your days, weeks and months. But yet, you lie in bed thinking about those things you wish you would be doing and making time for.

Just Listen

Taking care of yourself first impacts those around you.

Not only how you present yourself to others evolves, but what and how you be becomes contagious. It influences the environment in which you live.

When you wake up each morning committed to doing the things that make you a better version of yourself than you were the day before, slowly it begins to be recognized; especially with those you are closest with.

Though, it’s not about being recognized, it’s about being your honest, authentic and best version of yourself; your truth.

Flex Your Mindfulness Muscle

You can’t control what comes up in your head.

In turn, we end up judging ourselves, harshly, which ultimately transcends into how we act.

All of this stemming from a mysterious fictional void. We take something that’s not real and allow it to make decisions on our behalf; decisions on how we act, how we present ourselves and who we become.

Again, we can’t control what comes up in our head. What we can control is how we handle it.